In The Year 2525 (Exordium and Terminus)

Lately I've been listening to WMNF 88.5, a community radio station in Tampa. I've been listening to it partly because the news is a lot less biased (they don't have to kowtow to advertisers and such), but mostly because their music selection is quite eclectic. I'm always hearing something amazing that the corporately owned stations don't play.

And while driving home through a steady rain tonight the station played a song that I can't believe I've never heard before. At least I don't recall ever hearing it. The song is titled In The Year 2525 (Exordium and Terminus) and it was number one on the Billboard Hot 100 for six weeks back in 1969. It was performed by the Nebraska duo Zager and Evans (no longer together).

Now, I didn't grow up in the 60's, but I did go through a musical phase in college where I listened to 60's and 70's music almost exclusively. Pink Floyd, The Doors, The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Fleetwood Mac, Paul McCartney. You get the picture. So how the heck did I miss coming across this song? Beats me.

Anyway, as soon as I got home I Googled it. All I had to go on was a few of the lines I had memorized so I could search and find out which artists sung it and what it was titled. Luckily, I even came across a really cool video that someone had put together on YouTube to go along with it. Check it out!

In The Year 2525 (Exordium and Terminus)

Pretty cool song, eh? Quite visionary for 1969. Now I'd just love to see someone do a really killer mashup of it! Maybe a little something like this Beatles vs. Jay-Z mashup. And check Ringo Starr on the turntable. Wicked!

The Grey Album Mashup

And while I'm on the subject of mashups, here's a cool one featuring Green Day and Oasis. This is one of my favorites.

Green Day vs. Oasis Masup

How To Filter Kontera Ads On Your Blog

These days many bloggers are using Kontera ads on their blogs. Kontera's ContentLink ads can be a great additional source of revenue and can be used in conjunction with other contextual advertising services like Google AdSense, etc.

But one common issue, even on some of the bigger blogs, is that many of them don't "filter" their Kontera ContentLink ads...at all. What do I mean by filtering? Well, let's say that you're writing the title of book or movie. You obviously don't want the ads displayed in parts of the title. It looks bad and is very annoying to the reader. Or if you're writing a sponsored post you certainly don't want any contextual ads showing up in that post. And neither will the company paying for it.

So how do you control where the Kontera ContentLink ads show up and where they don't show up? It's actually very simple. Just use Kontera's ContextLink™ Text Filter, otherwise known as Span filter tags.

For example, let's say that you've written a blog post that is five paragraphs long, but you don't want any Kontera ContentLink ads displayed in the third paragraph. Then simply add the Kontera ContextLink™ filter tags "around" the third paragraph like this:

Here's another example. Let's say that you really hate Aaron Cook. I mean you really, really hate him. And you don't want any Kontera ads getting in the way of your ability to express your severe and unmatched distaste for him. :P It would look like this:

It's as simple as that. Just put the filter tags around the words and paragraphs where you don't want the ads to display and voila! No ContentLink ads.

Will It Blend? - BIC Lighters

This latest Will It Blend video has got to be the funniest one in the series so far. At least to me. I totally cracked up...especially at the very end. Tom's hair and facial expression are...well, classic.

Now, some people might say that it's not too smart of an idea to throw six BIC lighters in a Blendtec blender and hit the smoothie button. Those people would be right. :P



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The One Word Blog Meme - I've Been Tagged!

Oh yeah, I've been tagged! Upon checking my messages today on MyBlogLog, I found that my friend Mike from MeAndMyDrum has most definitely tagged me for the One Word Blog Meme. Thanks Mike!

The One Word Blog Meme is a list of short questions that you answer with just one word...hence the name, One Word Blog Meme!

But before I start, I want to quickly mention that there's sort of a trick when it comes to memes like this...

And that trick is to erase the person's answers before you begin to answer the questions, yourself. This should make your answers completely original, and should eliminate the chances of them being influenced by the previous person's answers!

Anyway, here are the questions with my one-word answers:

1. Where is your cell phone? drawer
2. Relationship? single
3. Your hair? fire
4. Work? necessary
5. Your sister? unbegotten
6. Your favorite thing? family
7. Your dream last night? outré
8. Your favorite drink? coffee
9. Your dream car? Bugatti
10. The room you’re in? office
11. Your shoes? Airwalk
12. Your fears? nonexistent
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? exuberant
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? myself
15. What are you not good at? conformity
16. Muffin? chocolate
17. One of your wish list items? camera
18. Where you grew up? Pennsylvania
19. Last thing you did? type
20. What are you wearing? boxers
21. What aren’t you wearing? frown
22. Your pet? deceased
23. Your computer? HP
24. Your life? odd
25. Your mood? focussed
26. Missing? family
27. What are you thinking about right now? blogging
28. Your car? shiny
29. Your kitchen? spotless
30. Your summer? sultry
31. Your favorite color? silver
32. Last time you laughed? today
33. Last time you cried? uncertain
34. School? university
35. Love? life

I'm tagging:

Well, everyone I was going to tag has already been tagged! So if you haven't been tagged already, and would like to be, just let me know and I'll add your link here in the post. ;)

I'm coining this Reverse Tagging, and you could be the first on the Internet to participate. Yeah, go you!

Lightning Strikes Again - But I'm Back Online!

Hey everyone, just a quick note to let you know that I'm back online as of this morning! In case you didn't know, my computer was hit by lightning again...yes, AGAIN!!!

Yep, it happened Friday night...which is why I haven't been able to respond to the last 6 comments in the 8 Random Facts post. But I will!

Anyway, thanks so much for your participation in the meme. And a multitude of thanks goes out for your awesome comments that followed. Oh yeah!


Long story short...the Florida lightning strike totally blew out my PC's network card. But thankfully, there was no modem damage this time, unlike last time (mentioned briefly near the end of the post).

So now I just need to catch up on my email. And I have tons...more than 300 to sort through. Fun, fun fun! But as soon as I finish that, I'll get some new posts up on here. :)

8 Random Facts About Aaron - The Tagging Game

I was tagged the other day by Tim of Listikal.com. Now, I only met Tim a few weeks ago as a blogger, but I've enjoyed his blog ever since. He's a really great guy and his blog is definitely worth a regular read. Anyway, here we go...

THE RULES:

1. Post these rules before you give you the facts.
2. List eight (8) random facts about yourself.
3. At the end of your post, choose (tag) eight people and list their names (linking to them).
4. Leave them a comment on their blog letting them know they've been tagged!

8 Random Facts About Me...

1. My new favorite snack is Pretzel Flipz, the chocolate covered pretzels. Delicious! The serving size says 8 pieces, but I eat them by the bag! :P

2. I'm a total coffeehead. I love coffee of all kinds, though I don't use it as a stimulant to wake up (I'll take decaf if it's available). I simply love the taste and the aroma. Oh, and I prefer organic.

3. I've saved two people from drowning - though I'm not a lifeguard. One was when I was younger and on vacation, and the other was at a school where I used to teach 4th thru 6th grade.

4. I'm a genetic taster (more commonly known as supertaster), which means that my tongue detects things in foods that the average tongue cannot. It's kinda like the difference between a dog's sense of smell and ours. It's fun sometimes, but much of the time I find it annoying - there are A LOT of foods I just can't tolerate!

5. I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue. :P

6. I love writing music and poetry...though I haven't in a while. :( You can listen to some of it on my MySpace music page (my main page is here). I just set them up, so they're not totally pretty! :P

7. I'm practically addicted to chocolate. It's my all-time favorite. As Kramer would say to me, "You're a slave to your dark master...the cocoa bean!" True, oh so true.

8. Seinfeld is my favorite TV show. I pretty much have the entire series memorized by now. Vandelay Industries! :P

I'm tagging: Valentin, Mark Base, Bobby Revell, Danielle, Jade, Andrew Murphy, Mark, Forest Parks

Web Crash 2007 - All Online Data Lost!

Web Crash 2007
All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash!

LOL, now that's a good one if I ever did see one. :P

Indexed Quickly By Google - I Mean Really Quickly!

Wow, it looks like I'm getting indexed pretty quickly by Google now. I had just put up my post about SunRocket shutting down and was looking on Google for additional resources on the subject, when I came across my own blog post on it as a search result. Heh, it kinda made me chuckle. :P

But it's good to know that it no longer takes days for me to be indexed by the almighty Google. Though sometimes I get the feeling I'm being stalked. *raises eyebrow*

SunRocket - Now That Is A Pretty Big Gotcha!

You may have already heard that SunRocket, the VoIP company that was second only to Vonage, has shut down suddenly and without notice, leaving over 200,000 customers stranded without phone service. And the company's CEO Lisa Hook (formerly from AOL) resigned just days before the shutdown. How convenient.

Many of the employees weren't even aware. One customer service representative found out when he called the SunRocket 800 number and heard the words, "We are no longer taking customer service or sales calls. Goodbye!" Yeah, nice way to find out that you no longer have a job!


So much for a company that built its entire business by claiming to be void of the "gotchas" of the other telephone service providers...

SunRocket's "No Gotchas!" policy: "How many times have you questioned a phone bill, seen a fee that had no explanation, or paid too much for a calling feature? Phone companies these days like to raise rates without clear notice, make up bogus charges, and hit customers with cancellation charges and penalties.

Escape the 'gotchas' of other telephone providers, with SunRocket's No Gotcha Policy. SunRocket Service has no hidden fees or "gotchas", making it easy and risk-free for you to try Internet phone service."

Yeah, but they failed to mention that they'd be shutting down business without properly letting anyone know. Now that's a pretty big gotcha. It's more like...Welcome to SunRocket, the no gotcha phone company. We are no longer taking customer service or sales calls. Gotcha!

I think corporate America has some real hard thinking to do. Crap like this should not happen to customers or employees.

Note: If you're looking for great VoIP digital phone service, check out VOIC Broadband Communications. They offer several different carriers and a host of other phone and cell phone products and plans.

Five Awesome Firefox Extensions - Part II

Since my first post on Firefox extensions went over so well, I've decided to make it a regular category here on this blog. So with no further ado, here are five more awesome Firefox extensions that will make your blogging and online life easier and more enjoyable.

Five Awesome Firefox Extensions
Part II

1. coComment - This Firefox Extension has been getting rave reviews from those who've been using it. With coComment you can keep track of all of the comments you've left on people's blogs and websites, all in one convenient place. Whenever someone has added to the conversation, coComment will let automatically let you know!

When installed, coComment is seamlessly integrated in your Firefox browser and any comments you make around the web will be automatically added to the tracked conversations in your coComment account. This way you'll know when someone has replied to one of your comments and you comment back.

This is a really excellent extension that allows you to stay to "connected" to all the online conversations you've participated in. Definitely two thumbs up for coComment.


2. Session Manager - This extension is great for when you're researching things to blog about and want to collect and keep track of your sources. Session Manager saves the session of your open browser windows and tabs so you can come back to them later. If you're afraid of losing browsing data, this extension will ease all of your fears.

What's great about Session Manager is that it saves and restores all browser windows and tabs, both automatically and on command. So if by chance something happens that causes your browser to crash, or if you accidentally close any windows or tabs, you won't lose the data from that browsing session. Session Manager will restore it!

Note: Firefox 2.0 itself does have built-in crash recovery for restoring and reopening tabs after a crash, but Session Manager stores more data and is more reliable. In addition, it allows you to save and restore multiple browsing sessions, as opposed to just the most recent one.


3. BlogRovR - If you're like most people, you don't have time to read all the blogs you'd like to. So why not let RovR do it for you! RovR fetches posts (from your favorite blogs or blogs that you list) that discuss whatever topics you're browsing on the web.

Simply tell BlogRovR which blogs you like, and as you browse the web, it'll instantly fetch posts from those blogs that link to whatever web pages you’re viewing. The BlogRovR tray slides out from the side to show you summaries of these posts. From there you can click to read a full post, right on the page it’s about.

All in all, BlogRovR is a nice little time-saver and a good addition to your regular feed reader. As you browse the web you get a neat view of all the blogs covering the very content that you're browsing. Very cool.


4. Speak It - This extension is another good one for saving you some time. With Speak It you can have pages or selected text read to you out loud so you can attend to other things, like doing the dishes or just lying down and resting your eyes as you listen.

Speak It is actually a rewritten version of FoxyVoice (no longer available) and it uses the MicroSoft TTS (Text-To-Speech) Engine.


5. Trailfire - The Trailfire extension allows you to mark pages that you think are interesting by leaving notes right on those pages. These notes are linked together into "trails" that you can organize any way you wish. This allows for a collaborative discovery on the Web.

These trails will let you guide people on the Web, but they're also collaborative because people can comment on your trails and add new marked pages themselves if you let them. When you're looking for something online, Trailfire is handy for to marking the pages you find. These pages can be automatically shared with everyone else through the search engines, or you can just flip a switch and keep it all private.


Do you have a favorite Firefox extension? Leave a comment and let everyone know! And if you enjoyed this post, then give it a Digg! :)

Five Awesome Firefox Extensions - Part I is here.

Bobbing For Sunglasses - The Sunglasses Dunk-A-Thon

From the fellas behind the crazy video of a guy catching sunglasses on his face (multiple times) and A Streaker Among Us, a though-provoking look at life "where dreams began with naked people," here's their latest fun little creation...Bobbing for glasses in the Sunglasses Dunk-A-Thon. Enjoy!

The Sunglasses Dunk-A-Thon

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What Happens When A Blog Takes Over?

If you've ever wondered how much a blog can increase the amount of traffic to a domain name, then here's a killer example. It's based on the actual traffic data for this blog, and the results are definitely impressive.

Friday the 13th To Friday the 13th

First, a little Aaron Cook dot Com™ history...and if you're of the superstitious type, then you might want to watch out for these facts!

1. The Aaron Cook dot Com™ blog was first launched in April of 2007 on Friday the 13th.
2. The three-month anniversary for Aaron Cook dot Com™ was two days ago...also on Friday the 13th!

OK, perhaps a tad eerie for some, but what's that got to do with site traffic? Well, three months is also the magic number when it comes to the Alexa traffic rank. And this post will show you just how much the web traffic to AaronCook.com has jumped ever since I launched it here on this blog.

Who owned it before? Well, the AaronCook.com domain name used to be owned by a successful defense attorney based in Virginia. But thankfully, and after four long years of waiting, I acquired it for myself - the real deal when it comes to complete and total Aaron Cookness. ;)

The Alexa Rank - What The Heck Is It?

Quite simply, Alexa's traffic rank is based on three (3) months of aggregated, historical traffic data. This data is derived from Internet users who have the Alexa Toolbar installed on their computers. The traffic rank of a site reflects both the number of users who visit that site, as well as the number of pages those users have viewed on that particular site.

Alexa's three-month change is determined by comparing the site's current traffic rank with its traffic rank from three months ago. The three-month change is very important as it'll show you precisely how much the traffic here has gone up in the last three months since I've been blogging.

What Happens When A Blog Takes Over

OK, so now it's time for the moment of truth. As most bloggers know, blogs are the best when it comes to driving site traffic. So how much has the traffic for AaronCook.com actually increased? Let's take a look...

• Reach - up 14,650%
• Traffic Rank - up a whopping 7,303,713
• Page Views - up 40%
  

Now those are some pretty significant traffic increases. And as far as Alexa traffic rankings go, such increases are nothing short of astronomical.

Aaron Cook Dot Com™ Worldwide

So where exactly am I across the globe? Here's an interesting look at the percentage of readers I have from other countries.

Not surprisingly, the majority of my readers come from the United States. But what is surprising is the percentage of readers I have from Romania! It's definitely a much larger-than-normal result for that region, and I have absolutely no clue as to why. All I can say is thanks for being my friend! :)


If you notice, the percentage of readers I have from countries other than the United States is quite a lot. This explains why the overall Alexa traffic rank is somewhat lower than it should be for a site that receives 200+ visitors per day.

One of the well-known issues with the Alexa rank (Alexa even mentions it themselves) is that the traffic data is derived solely from the Internet users who have the Alexa Toolbar installed on their computers. Unfortunately, that excludes a large percentage of foreign users.

Nonetheless, it's pretty clear how much the traffic here has increased ever since the domain name was moved from a static website to a blog. And so, my great and wonderful friends, that is what happens when a blog takes over!

Weird Spam Email Of The Week

Like most people, I get a ton of spam email every day. Most of it's for porn, and the rest of it is generally from people who I swear must be spying on me through my bedroom window - they're the ones constantly trying to get me to buy male enhancements and such. :P

But every now and again I get a spam email that's either really funny or really odd. This one definitely falls into the "really odd" category. Just read it and you'll see what I mean. This is how it was written:

Dear Aaron,
how are you doing. i hope fine.
Aaron, i am Charles from west Africa .i will like to come into
relationship with you.please where are you from?try get back to
me.......regards

Weird. Very weird. And in the words of Forest Gump...That's all I have to say about that.

Blogging Interview With Blogara Walters - Part I

I had mentioned a short while back that I was interviewed about my blog. Well, I'm just now getting around to putting the interview up here - I've been playing major catch-up ever since my modem was struck by lightning, which kept me offline for almost a week (mentioned towards the end of this post).

So with no further ado, here's my imaginary blog interview with the famous media personality we all know and love (or hate!), Blogara Walters. Har har. Hope you enjoy it Brown Baron! :)

Blogging Interview With Blogara Walters - Part I

Blogara Walters: Aaron, you've only been blogging for a short time...what is it that got you interested in blogging in the first place?

Aaron: Sorry, I can't answer that question right now, I'm busy blogging.

Blogara Walters: OK. Then what is your favorite thing about blogging?

Aaron: Hold on a sec, I'm busy blogging here.

Blogara Walters: I see. And what is it that you're blogging about at this very moment?

Aaron: Just give me two more minutes Blogara. I really need to finish up this blog post. It's very important. Just two minutes.

Five Minutes Later...

Aaron: I'm so sorry about that. I'm all yours now.

Blogara Walters: Yes, as I was saying...You've only been blogging for a short time. What is it that first got you interested in blogging?

Aaron: Oh shoot. I forgot to ping that last post. Just a sec.

Blogara Walters: Uh, OK.

Aaron: And let me login to my FeedBurner account here real fast while I'm at it.

What?! No way my subscriber count has gone down that much! Holy crap, I need to find out what's going on here. Hang on Blogara, this is extremely important!

Whew! False alarm. It looks like there's just a glitch with the Yahoo! RSS aggregator and it's not reporting the subscription numbers for today. Now that was a close call. I thought something major had happened with my blog.

Blogara Walters: It appears that blogging can be a somewhat stressful at times, yes?

Aaron: Yes it can Blogara. Generally it's a total blast. But occasionally things can happen that are somewhat stressful. So whaddaya say we go get a couple of drinks and chill out for a bit. We can pick up on this a little bit later. But right now I need to relax for a few.

Blogara Walters: Well, I don't have to report back to the office until later this evening so that sounds like a fine idea to me. And I'll actually get to see what a blogger does when he's not blogging, so that's a bonus.

Aaron: Great. I've been on this computer all day and I could really use some fresh air and a couple of cold ones.

Blogara Walters: Then the drinks are on me.

Aaron: Now that's what I like to hear! Let me just reply to a couple of these comments here before we leave.

Part II coming soon. ;)

Will It Blend? - iPhone

Youtubers have been asking Tom to blend an iPhone and now they finally get their wish! We all know that the iPhone can make phone calls, play movies, play music, surf the web, and a whole lot more. But will it blend? Well, that is the question!

Really great slow-motion effect used this time, too. And you'll hear a voice scream out, "Nooooooo!" :P



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George Bush - An Insult Even To Cavemen?

Man, if those poor cavemen haven't already suffered enough, what with all those Geico commercials on TV these days, now they have to put up with this!


I have one question, though...are we sure that Bush is in the right place here? I mean, it's clear that he's a bipedal primate of the family Hominidae, but I'm quite certain his scientific classification as a species is Homo neanderthalensis, not Homo sapiens.

Lemme just double-check to make sure...

George W. Bush
Kingdom: Animilia
Phylum: Chordata
Class: Mammalia
Order: Primates
Family: Hominidae
Genus: Homo
Species: H. neanderthalensis

Yep, I knew they had it mixed up!

Update: I just got an email from someone who thought I was making a homosexual joke about Bush since I had italicized the word Homo above. I wasn't. That is the correct way for it to be written - the correct animal nomenclature. Scientific names must be printed or written in specific ways to reduce misunderstandings among scientists who work in different countries, subdisciplines or time periods.

Scientific names for the basic taxonomic levels above Genus are always capitalized, but not italicized. The Genus name is always capitalized and italicized (or underlined if hand-written), and the full species name must always be italicized.

But beyond that, I personally don't find it funny to make jokes about homosexuals, nor would I ever insult them by comparing them to Bush! :P

The Importance Of Posting Frequently

Every once in a while I get asked the question, "Is it important for me to post to my blog frequently?" My answer: Yes, it is very important. And here's a perfect, real-world example of why it's so very important.

Posting to your blog on a frequent basis keeps your readers engaged and interested, which keeps them coming back for more. If there's one thing most people can't stand, it's going to a blog over and over again and seeing nothing but old content on it. Eventually, your readers may forget about you forever and never visit your blog again. And no one wants that!

But there's another reason why posting is so important...the search engines. Not updating your content frequently will lower your rankings in the search engines. The search engines look for updated content and take it into account when ranking sites. So you want to make sure that you're posting quality content to your blog as often as you can.

A Perfect Example

Now for that real-world example I was talking about. As most of you know, I was recently hit by lighting. OK, not me exactly; my high-speed modem was hit (I mentioned it here in this post). And that lightning strike kept me offline for about five days, which really took a toll on my blog traffic.

Lately, I've been averaging around 217 visitors per day. But since I was offline for many days, and unable to update this blog, my traffic had dipped significantly. And then, shortly after I was back online and had posted a few times, it made its climb back up again. Just take a look at my stats and you'll see what I mean.


As you can see in the bar graph below, the traffic levels are directly following my posting habits. No posts and they dip down. New posts and they climb back up. You can even see the direct result of my not having posted anything since Saturday. On Sunday and Monday the levels slowly began to creep down again.


Now, fluctuations are not always this severe. But here's real-world proof that they can be if you don't post frequently on your blog. And judging by my other stats, the majority of these fluctuations aren't due so much to the search engines themselves. They're mostly due to the many awesome subscribers I have to my FeedBurner site feed and Feedblitz. My readers know exactly when I have fresh, new content on here and that's when they swing by to read it! Of course, there are other variables as well (like Digg and such), but that's for another post.

So the moral of the story is simple. Keep those blogs alive and breathing folks! Post quality content and post it often!

What I Like About - A Brand New Category Launches!

Here's a nice heads-up for all of you kick-ass Aaron Cook dot Com™ readers out there...

I'm starting a brand new category here on the blog, and it'll be called What I Like About. This category will simply be my way of showing my personal appreciation for the people and things (especially fellow bloggers!) who've had, and who continue to have, a positive effect on me and my short life here on this 70.8% water/29.2% land, whirling, twirling sphere of ours.

The What I Like About category was conceived in my tiny, little brain last night whilst I laid awake, virulently plagued by complete and utter restlessness, and I'm doing it for two simple reasons: One, I'm a really nice guy. And two, I'm a really nice guy.

Har har, just kidding. I'm doing it because I've always held firm to the belief that it's vitally important to "actively" take the time to show your appreciation for the people and things that effect your life in a positive manner. And so, What I Like About was born.

So the only question now is, "Who will be the first person featured in the What I Like About category on Aaron Cook dot Com™?" Well, I'll give you two hints. Hint number one: Her name is Danielle. And hint number two: Her current blog is Pink Internet Marketing. Can you guess, can you guess?!

So watch for it to pop up here (all nice and pink) in the coming days. But as for right now, I'm still in the midst of catching up on A LOT of things. See, I've gotten a bit behind ever since some of our lovely Florida lightning totally blew out my high-speed modem last Friday. Yeah. The whole fiasco had me stranded offline for a total of five (5) days! [Insert barf sound here] :P

So I've got a ton of things I still need to get done online. And one of those things is finally posting my blogger interview. Man, Brown Baron, Valentin, and all the others must think I'm on drugs or something!

But have no fear friends. Now that I'm plugged in again, I'm right on the mark. And that calls for a celebration, I believe. Tall, cold one...down you go! :)

Great Truths - A Little Friday Humor

I was going through all my old email and came across this little bit of humor that a friend had sent me a few years back. And since it's Friday, I figure it's the perfect time for a few chuckles.

Great Truths That Little Children Have Learned

1. No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2. When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3. If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4. Never ask your 3-year-old brother to hold a tomato.
5. You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6. Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7. Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8. You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9. Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10. The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

Great Truths That Adults Have Learned

1. Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2. Wrinkles don't hurt.
3. Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4. Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5. Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not for the toy.

Great Truths About Growing Old

1. Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2. Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3. When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4. You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5. It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6. Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7. Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

The Four Stages Of Life

1. You believe in Santa Claus.
2. You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3. You are Santa Claus.
4. You look like Santa Claus.

Success Is...

At age 4 success is...not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is...having friends.
At age 16 success is...having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is...having money.
At age 50 success is...having money.
At age 70 success is...having a driver's license.
At age 75 success is...having friends.
At age 80 success is...not piddling in your pants.

Top Five Posts - June 2007

For this month's Top Posts recap, here are the top posts for June in case you missed any of them. Posts listed the monthly Top Posts category are those posts that received the most traffic, whether it be from the search engines, Digg, other blogs, etc.

Top Five Four Posts - June 2007

Five Awesome Firefox Extensions For Bloggers - Looking for a better way to blog or to get things done online? Here are five awesome Firefox extensions that will definitely make your online life a whole lot easier. These Firefox extensions are really great. My personal favorite so far is Split Browser. This thing rocks, plain and simple.

Keyboard Shortcuts For Copyright And Trademark Symbols - These keyboard shortcuts will save you some valuable time whenever you need to use them in order to mark your works and protect your property rights, both online and off.

Will Ferrell On George Bush On Global Warming - The funniest video I've ever seen of Will Ferrell. He's got George Bush down to a T on this one. Prepare to laugh!

FeedBurner And Google - Why Is It Good? - Ever since Google acquired FeedBurner for the rumored price of around $100 million, the RSS management company has become much more interesting to a lot of people. So is this acquisition good for us bloggers?

Overall Top Posts

Here are a couple of the posts that have consistently brought the most traffic overall. I'm not listing the Firefox extensions post or the keyboard shortcuts post here since they're already listed above. The Spinal Tap post has gotten a lot of views recently due to the July concert date, of course.

Spinal Tap Reunites For Live Earth Concert! - Spinal Tap, the fictitious heavy metal band, has indeed reunited to play at the upcoming Live Earth Concert on July 7, 2007. Rock on! This post also includes the video wherein Marty DiBergi gets Nigel, David and Derek to reunite the band.

Bugatti Veyron 16.4 - Where's My Speed Key? - Here's a look at the astounding Bugatti Veyron 16.4, the fastest (0-60 in 2.5 seconds with a top speed of 253 mph) most expensive (1.2 million dollars) and most powerful street-legal production car in the world. I had quite a bit of fun with this post...as you can probably tell from reading it. :P There's also a video that will give you some good looks at the Veyron.

The Fireworks Song - Happy Fourth of July!

Here's wishing everyone a very happy and safe Independence Day! And in the spirit of things, here's a comical fireworks video I just came across. It's by Rhett McLaughlin and Link Neal of the comedy duo Rhett & Link. Have a great holiday and enjoy!

Freelance Fireworks Hall of Fame

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